New Year's Eve is my favorite holiday. Sure, it's a great excuse to party – and I never frown on that. But I love New Year's Eve for reasons way beyond mere drunkenness.
First, it is the rare holiday everyone can celebrate, regardless of nationality or religion or ethnicity. Time, after all, marches on for us all.
Yes, I also love watching the ball drop and singing “Auld Lang Syne” and kissing strangers at midnight. But here is why I really love New Year's Eve: It is the one night of the year for Reflection and Hope. In my book, we don't spend enough time on either. That we set aside one moment to wallow in both is so freaking cool.
This past year certainly saw its share of Tragedy and Sorrow. We lost jobs and relationships, money and opportunities. Wars raged, world leaders stumbled, the economy sputtered.
In the last year, some of our Loved Ones died.
In so many ways, this was just another awful year.
But, you know, this past year wasn't all bad. Some of us did find new jobs and new relationships. Some of us did manage to scrape up another dime and create new opportunities. The world did not end – not even close.
In the last year, some of our Loved Ones were actually BORN!
In spite or because of everything, we survived another year!
Hooray for us!
I do not know what this New Year will bring. Probably, it will have its share of Triumphs and Tragedies, wars and opportunities, its deaths and its births, the Comedy and the Sorrow. Maybe, the next twelve months will turn out to be just another awful year.
Or, maybe not.
Because, tonight, man – oh, the Potential. Ah, the HOPE!
Happy New Year, All of Us!
Friday, December 31, 2010
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Wars On Christmas? Really?
Tis the season for certain cable news networks and disingenuous politicians to hunker down and fight against all those many Wars On Christmas. Here are my three favorites:
Happy Holidays! = A War On Christmas?
People who say “Happy Holidays!” are merely trying to convey Tidings of Goodwill to as many people as possible during a season when there are a lot of holidays. Instead of getting all pissy because someone was nice to you outside of your narrowly-defined, tight-ass parameter, just be thankful nobody is saying what you probably really deserve to hear: “Fuck off, ass-wipe!”
X-mas = A War On Christmas?
Again with the paranoid, “persecuted” Christian! Cuz, it's just so gosh-darn hard nowadays to practice Christianity in this country! Try taking Communion in a dingy, rat-infested basement, hoping that none of your rag-tag band of congregants is really an undercover government agent who will send you and your family to a forced-labor camp. Otherwise, knock it off with your ridiculous and historically inaccurate rants about NOTHING! Here's a link: http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/1627/why-is-christmas-abbreviated-xmas
Commercialism = A War On Christmas?
For eleven months of the year, Conservative Christians rant that anything less than pure, unregulated Capitalism is Satanic Socialism. But the day after Thanksgiving, shopping suddenly becomes a kick in Jesus's groin because “Commercialism takes the meaning out of Christmas?” If Capitalism is indeed the Christian Way, how can the Biggest Capitalist Event of the Year – which drives our entire economy and is done in His name – demean Christ? Isn't Decadence the best way to boost Capitalism? And isn't that why it is morally wrong to tax the Rich? I am fully aware that a Christian Capitalist need buy just one yacht to do God's Work. But how many Chia Pets does a poor fuck like me need to buy to get to Heaven? I'm no economist, or a theologian – perhaps a Conservative Christian can explain all this to me.
But, unlike certain cable news hosts, I choose not to be perpetually angry, especially at this time of the year. So, I say unto you, with all the Love and Peace and Tidings of Great Joy in my heart, “MERRY X-MAS AND HAPPY HOLIDAYS!”
Happy Holidays! = A War On Christmas?
People who say “Happy Holidays!” are merely trying to convey Tidings of Goodwill to as many people as possible during a season when there are a lot of holidays. Instead of getting all pissy because someone was nice to you outside of your narrowly-defined, tight-ass parameter, just be thankful nobody is saying what you probably really deserve to hear: “Fuck off, ass-wipe!”
X-mas = A War On Christmas?
Again with the paranoid, “persecuted” Christian! Cuz, it's just so gosh-darn hard nowadays to practice Christianity in this country! Try taking Communion in a dingy, rat-infested basement, hoping that none of your rag-tag band of congregants is really an undercover government agent who will send you and your family to a forced-labor camp. Otherwise, knock it off with your ridiculous and historically inaccurate rants about NOTHING! Here's a link: http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/1627/why-is-christmas-abbreviated-xmas
Commercialism = A War On Christmas?
For eleven months of the year, Conservative Christians rant that anything less than pure, unregulated Capitalism is Satanic Socialism. But the day after Thanksgiving, shopping suddenly becomes a kick in Jesus's groin because “Commercialism takes the meaning out of Christmas?” If Capitalism is indeed the Christian Way, how can the Biggest Capitalist Event of the Year – which drives our entire economy and is done in His name – demean Christ? Isn't Decadence the best way to boost Capitalism? And isn't that why it is morally wrong to tax the Rich? I am fully aware that a Christian Capitalist need buy just one yacht to do God's Work. But how many Chia Pets does a poor fuck like me need to buy to get to Heaven? I'm no economist, or a theologian – perhaps a Conservative Christian can explain all this to me.
But, unlike certain cable news hosts, I choose not to be perpetually angry, especially at this time of the year. So, I say unto you, with all the Love and Peace and Tidings of Great Joy in my heart, “MERRY X-MAS AND HAPPY HOLIDAYS!”
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